THE MEETING I DIDN'T SEE COMING
November 8th, 2019. 2:30 PM.
"Syed, can you come to the GM's office?"
I grabbed my notebook. Probably a routine check-in. Maybe discussing next quarter's training budget.
I walked in.
November 8th, 2019. 2:30 PM.
I grabbed my notebook. Probably a routine check-in. Maybe discussing next quarter's training budget.
I walked in.
My GM sat at the conference table. The Director of HR sat next to her.
That's when I knew.
HR only attends meetings for one reason: terminations or disciplinary action.
My stomach dropped.
What followed was a 22-minute conversation that ended my employment at that property.
Not for theft. Not for harassment. Not for negligence.
For something far more insidious: political blindness and perceived arrogance.
This wasn't a story I wanted to write. Getting fired is humiliating. Admitting you deserved it is harder.
But this experience taught me more about leadership, workplace dynamics, and self-awareness than any success ever could.
Here's what happened, what I did wrong, what I learned, and the framework I built to ensure I never repeat those mistakes.
I was a Front Desk Supervisor at a 480-room upscale hotel. I'd been in the role for 9 months. Performance was solid—guest scores were up, my team liked me, operations ran smoothly.
But beneath the surface, I was making catastrophic political mistakes I didn't even recognize.
Mistake #1: I Criticized Leadership in Front of My Team (Month 4)
Our GM announced a new policy: All front desk agents must upsell room upgrades to every guest. Agents would get $5 commission per upgrade sold.
I thought this was a terrible idea. It felt pushy, transactional, not aligned with our "hospitality-first" brand.
"Look, I know corporate is pushing this upsell thing. Honestly, I think it's a bad policy—it makes us feel like used car salesmen. But we have to comply. Just do your best, and don't stress about it."
Being honest with my team
Building solidarity ("we're in this together")
Undermining leadership's decision
Signaling to my team: "You don't have to take this seriously"
One of my agents mentioned my comment to the Rooms Director during a one-on-one.
Rooms Director told my GM: "Syed is openly criticizing the upsell policy in front of his team."
Mistake #2: I Went Over My Manager's Head (Month 6)
I proposed a new training program to reduce front desk turnover. I presented it to my direct manager (Front Desk Manager) first.
Her response: "I like it, but now's not the right time. We have too much going on. Let's revisit next quarter."
I thought she was being overly cautious. I believed in the project. So I did something stupid.
I scheduled a meeting directly with the GM (skipping my manager) and pitched the training program.
GM: "This is great, Syed. Why hasn't [your manager] brought this to me?"
Me: "I showed it to her, but she said it wasn't a priority right now. I thought you should see it anyway."
Taking initiative
Advocating for a good idea
Disrespecting chain of command
Making my manager look bad (undermining her)
GM told my manager about the meeting.
My manager pulled me aside: "If you disagree with my decision, we talk about it privately. You don't go around me to the GM. That's not how this works."
I apologized. But the damage was done.
Mistake #3: I Made a Joke at Leadership's Expense (Month 8)
At a hotel-wide staff meeting, the GM announced we were implementing a new "guest recovery budget"—$50/agent/month to resolve complaints without manager approval.
Agent: "Do you think we'll actually be able to use that $50, or will management second-guess us?"
"Knowing this place, they'll give us $50 and then audit every penny we spend. We'll need a 12-page justification form."
Everyone laughed.
Making a harmless joke
Undermining a positive initiative
Creating cynicism ("management doesn't trust us")
Someone mentioned the joke to a manager. It got back to the GM.
This was Strike #3.
At my quarterly performance review, I expected positive feedback.
GM: "Syed, we need to talk about some concerns. Over the past few months, multiple people have reported that you undermine leadership decisions, go around your manager, and make negative comments about management."
"The upsell comment—I was just being real with my team."
"Going to you directly—I thought I was showing initiative."
GM: "Individually, these might be small. Together, they show a pattern. You position yourself as separate from leadership—like you're on the team's side against management. That's not a supervisor's role. A supervisor bridges the gap between leadership and staff. You're widening it."
I argued. I defended myself. I said I was being misunderstood.
That was my final mistake: I didn't take ownership.
GM: "I don't think you're a good fit for a leadership role here. We're letting you go, effective today."
It took me 3 months of unemployment and serious reflection to understand what actually happened.
Error #1: I Didn't Understand My Role
Advocate for my team
Protect them from "bad" policies
Execute leadership's vision (even when I disagreed)
Translate corporate decisions into frontline action
I positioned myself as "one of the team" instead of "one of the leaders."
When you're in a leadership role (even supervisor), you're no longer "one of the guys." You're management.
If you undermine management, you undermine yourself.
Privately discussed concerns with my manager or GM
Publicly supported the policy with my team
"I know upselling can feel uncomfortable, but here's how we can do it in a way that feels genuine: [specific examples]. Let's make this work within our hospitality culture."
Error #2: I Confused "Honesty" with "Transparency"
"I'm just being honest with my team. They appreciate that I'm real with them."
There's a difference between transparency and undermining.
Transparency: Explaining the "why" behind decisions, even difficult ones.
Undermining: Communicating that leadership is wrong and you're just complying under protest.
Say: "Leadership is prioritizing revenue growth this quarter. This upsell initiative is part of that strategy. Here's how we'll make it work."
Your team doesn't need to know your private disagreements with leadership. They need to know you support the direction, even when it's hard.
Error #3: I Didn't Respect Chain of Command
"If my manager isn't moving fast enough, I should escalate to someone who will."
Going over your manager's head is a career-killer—even if you're right.
It signals to leadership: "This person doesn't respect authority and can't work within structure."
It destroys your relationship with your manager (they'll never trust you again).
| Option A | Accept her decision. Wait for next quarter. |
| Option B | Ask for a follow-up conversation: "I respect that now isn't the right time. Can you help me understand what would need to change for this to be a priority? I want to make sure I'm aligned with your vision." |
| Option C | If I genuinely believed it was urgent, escalate with my manager's knowledge: "I feel strongly about this. Would you be open to us presenting it to the GM together?" |
Went around her. Fatal mistake.
Error #4: I Didn't Realize Jokes Have Consequences
"It's just a joke. Everyone knows I'm kidding."
When you're in a leadership role, your words carry weight—even casual ones.
Your "joke" becomes the team's belief.
My joke about management auditing the $50 budget planted doubt. Even though it was meant to be funny, it made the team cynical about the initiative before it even started.
When you're a leader, you don't get the luxury of casual cynicism. Your team takes cues from you.
If you're negative—even jokingly—they'll be negative seriously.
Error #5: I Didn't Take Ownership When Confronted
"That's not what I meant"
"People are misinterpreting me"
"You're right. I see how those actions undermined leadership. I was trying to build rapport with my team, but I crossed a line. I apologize. Here's what I'll do differently moving forward: [specific behavior changes]. Can you give me a chance to rebuild your trust?"
By the time I was confronted, the decision to let me go was already made. But my defensiveness sealed it.
If I had owned it immediately, I might have had a chance to course-correct.
I was furious. "They fired me for being honest? For taking initiative? This is ridiculous."
I blamed them.
I started talking to mentors. One conversation changed everything.
Mentor: "Syed, you were fired for political incompetence. You didn't understand the game you were playing. Leadership roles aren't just about operations—they're about navigating relationships, hierarchy, and perception. You failed at all three."
That stung. But it was true.
I started job hunting. But I realized: If I don't fix the underlying behavior, I'll repeat this mistake at the next property.
I built a framework to prevent this from happening again.
I now use this framework at every property I work at. It's kept me employed, promoted, and politically savvy.
Who do I represent?
Answer: Leadership. Not the team. Leadership.
Your job is to execute leadership's vision, even when you privately disagree.
What's my responsibility to my team?
Answer: Translate leadership decisions into action. Coach them to succeed within the system.
What's my responsibility to leadership?
Answer: Provide frontline feedback. Advocate for your team's needs. But support final decisions.
If a team member asks: "Do you agree with this new policy?"
Good Answer: "I understand why leadership is prioritizing this. Here's how we'll make it work."
Rule #1: Always go to your direct manager first. Even if you think they're wrong.
Rule #2: If you disagree with your manager's decision, request a follow-up conversation. Use this script:
"I respect your decision. Can you help me understand your reasoning? I want to make sure I'm aligned with your priorities."
Rule #3: Never, ever go over your manager's head without their knowledge.
Exception: If your manager is doing something illegal, unethical, or unsafe—then escalate. But this is rare.
"If my manager finds out I went around them, will they trust me less?"
If the answer is yes → Don't do it.
It doesn't matter what you meant. It matters how it's perceived.
Use language that signals alignment: "We're focused on..." "Leadership's priority is..." "Here's how we'll deliver on this..."
If someone complains about a policy, redirect: "I hear you. Here's how I'm thinking about it: [reframe positively]."
Emails/Slack can be forwarded. Write as if leadership will read it. Because they might.
"If this got back to my GM, would it hurt my reputation?"
If yes → Don't say it.
Step 1: Acknowledge
"You're right. I see how that was a problem."
"I apologize. That wasn't the impact I intended, but I understand why it was perceived that way."
"I was trying to [intention], but I see now that I should have [correct action]."
Step 4: Commit to Change
"Here's what I'll do differently: [specific behavior change]."
"I want to rebuild your trust. Can you let me know if you see any other areas where I need to adjust?"
If your first instinct is to defend or explain → Stop. Take ownership first. Explain second (and briefly).
Who are the key decision-makers? (GM, Rooms Director, DoS, DoF&B)
Who has their ear? (Admins, long-tenured managers, HR)
Build relationships with all three groups.
Regularly check in: "How can I support your goals this quarter?"
Share wins: "Your advice on [X] really helped—thank you."
If you were fired tomorrow, would 3+ people advocate for you?
If no → You don't have enough allies.
"I was let go from my last role. I made political mistakes—I undermined leadership, went around my manager, and didn't take ownership when confronted. I've spent the past 3 months reflecting and building a framework to ensure I never repeat those errors. I'm a better leader because of it."
One hired me—as a Front Desk Agent (step down from Supervisor).
I took it. I needed to rebuild my reputation from the ground up.
Supported every leadership decision (even when I privately disagreed)
Respected chain of command (never went around my manager)
Built relationships with key stakeholders
"You've changed. I don't know what happened at your last property, but you're one of the most politically aware people on my team. I'm promoting you to Supervisor."
I was promoted to Front Desk Manager at a larger property.
"You have a reputation for being operationally excellent and politically savvy. That's rare."
The irony: I was fired for political incompetence. I became known for political awareness.
Framework #1: The Pre-Meeting Self-Check
What's my goal in this meeting?
How might my words be perceived?
Am I respecting chain of command?
If this goes wrong, can I own it?
Framework #2: The "Disagree and Commit" Protocol
| Step 1 | Voice disagreement privately to your manager (once) |
| Step 2 | If decision stands, commit fully and publicly |
| Step 3 | Execute as if it was your idea |
Framework #3: The Reputation Repair Plan
| Months 2-3 | Execute flawlessly on basic responsibilities (rebuild trust in competence) |
| Months 4-6 | Go above and beyond (take on projects, help others, demonstrate growth) |
| Months 7-12 | Request feedback: "How am I doing? What should I improve?" |
Reputation recovery takes 12-18 months minimum. No shortcuts.
| Step 1 | Stop making it worse (no more undermining, no more going around your manager) |
| Step 2 | Request a meeting with your manager: "I want to check in on how I'm doing. Are there any concerns I should be aware of?" |
| Step 3 | If they raise concerns, take ownership immediately (use the Ownership Script above) |
| Step 4 | Ask for specific feedback: "What would you like to see me do differently?" |
| Step 5 | Execute on that feedback religiously for 90 days |
| Step 1 | Reflect honestly (what did you actually do wrong?) |
| Step 2 | Build the framework (how will you prevent this next time?) |
| Step 3 | Be honest in interviews (own the mistake, share what you learned) |
The Hospitality Insider
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Written by
Front Desk Manager at Galt House Hotel, managing 1,300+ rooms daily. Published author of 3 books on hospitality operations, leadership, and personal growth.
Discover how managing a hotel front desk provided me with invaluable leadership lessons that formal education couldn't teach.
